Anything that triggers you, reveals to you parts of yourself, that are yet to be healed.
You learn as you go along that you definitely cannot change anyone else and their beliefs. See how hard it is to change our own beliefs in the first place.
So take it as a given that their thoughts , beliefs ,words and actions are not in your control.
It is more useful to examine your own beliefs that cause you distress ( even if they are in relation to them)
The hurt comes when you feel your perspective of a situation is correct and you want them to concede to that point of view. Or atleast not oppose it.
Your perspective is just that…it is YOUR unique way of looking at something.
If I am to give you an example. There is a huge statue. A lot of people are made to stand around it, in a circle. They are told to sketch what they see.
They are told to interpret what the statue stands for…what it means to them.
Each ones sketch will depict THEIR perspective of the statue. There will be as many different perspectives as there are people. Unless you stand in the EXACT same position as them, you will never be able to see that particular angle , the shadows, the play of light etc that they can see.
Even if you do , their unique soul makeup , their souls journey so far, their karmic baggage , their conditioning will make it different from the way you view it.
So if you understand this example , you will realise that there is no right and wrong perspective. Each perspective is right for the person who sees it that way.
Your perspective is right for you. Even that perspective might change with time or different experiences.
Peace comes when you understand this deeply.
The best way through this quagmire is to understand and replace judgement with compassion.
Each to his own. Sounds simple but is really very profound. Indeed each unique soul should be allowed their own uniqueness.
One may observe, but one should not judge.
Its only when you judge or allow it to disturb your inner balance that it brings you grief.